WE OPEN ON -
EXT. PHOENIX, ARIZONA - WIDE ESTABLISHING SHOT - LATE AFTERNOON
The freeways are clogged with after-work commuters. The sound of horns honking and traffic fill the hot, dry air.
I have my thumb on the pulse of pop-culture, like a phantom heartbeat, I'm really feeling my own genius projected out to the idols of today who project it out to the sheep. I'm A-list, I'm first class. Like Frank said, "I'm a number one, top of the list". I've never lost a bet and my price is never cheap. So if you want to be seen with me, you'd better come with cash. I'm building a religion. Peddling perdition and with me you can rule the world.
I'd like to say that anything I just said is true, but it's not. I've never been outside of the United States, except for Mexico, but who really counts that anyway? I've been miserable most of my life and today I finally decided to kill myself.
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