STATE OF THE WEBSITE: JUNE 2008 EDITION

KARNALYTICS: PART TWO

AS PROMISED, here is the June 2008 STATE of the WEBSITE.

Here is the World Map. As you can see, most of my readers are still in the United States. This is still because I write primarily in English. I also have a large following in Canada, our jovial and polite neighbours to the North. I have also acquired many non-readers in South America, Europe and Australia. What is a non-reader, you may ask? A non-reader is an asshole who finds their way onto my site, then leaves abruptly. This not only leaves me with a high bounce rate, but also low self-esteem. Thanks, assholes.

Clearly a jump from last time, I now have many more readers in the United States. I thank Russell Murray, Ryan McShowoff and myself (because I comment on Hodgman's page, then pull in his readers by linking [because I am shameless]). Thank you all. Instead of California (who are still big readers), it is this time New York who reads more often than my friends and family in Arizona. Tennessee has dropped off the map for some reason. I hope I didn't offend anyone.



This is New York. Most of the readers here are in the big city. Manhattan, Brooklyn and Queens have the highest percentage while Ithaca, Woodside and Masbeth are giant non-reading assholes.

The graph here shows the last month's visits. Thankfully it has not dipped to below 2 readers per day. And there have only been two readers twice this month. Apparently, the fact that there is a new Gentleman's Bet regarding book publishing on 20 June really got people interested. 16 page views by 11 readers? Strange.

Here are the stats.

1. Good average time. Not as good as last time, but then I don't have California reading my page for hours on end anymore.

2. Good percentage of new visits. This means there are many more return visitors.

3. Terrible bounce rate. But it's okay. At least I have lots of readers.

4. North Dakota and Texas: drop dead.

5. Massachusetts: you're alright

Well, that's pretty much all. I hope this was informative. Not that you care. Or maybe you do, unless you're:

Texas, North Dakota, Massachusetts, Brazil, Australia, New Zealand, Greece, Morocco, Germany, the Czech Republic, the United Kingdom

[That is all]

KARNALYTICS

Here is your very first STATE OF THE WEBSITE. Here I will do my best to keep you up to date with how I'm faring socially via this blog. The pictures are very small. To research them in detail, please click on them to make them larger.

As it appears, I may be quite popular. Note, I said MAY BE.


Above is a WORLD VIEW of my Readers. As you can see, the majority are situated within the United States (labeled with arrows). The reason: most American's read English and I, the Author, write primarily in English. I realise the bounce rate looks high. This does not mean people hate my site. This is apparent by the percentage of new visits. At 38.52%, that means 61.48% of visitors are returning: RETURNING TO READ! Another reason for the high bounce rate: I have only one important page to view.


Here we delve a little deeper. With the United States holding the majority of my fans, we can now see clearly that Arizona and Tennessee are the biggest fans in the States. Or are they?*

Here, the bounce rate drops slightly. The percentage of new visitors also slightly declines. This is also a good thing. This means that I have returning Readers and also that they are bringing friends. Massachusetts, Iowa, Pennsylvania, Virginia, South Carolina, Colorado, Oklahoma and Texas all seem to be pretty sleepy. You may also note that it says 12 regions yet there are only 11 highlighted. This is labeled on my personal charts as 'not set'. I take this to mean that someone in either the government is reading or perhaps Hoboken, New Jersey, which I refuse to believe is inhabited by humans, but is the seat of Heaven.

You may ask: what about California? Read on.


*California appears to hold my SINGLE BIGGEST FAN. The average time on site alone makes me feel special. Also, there is a Reader in Hollywood. This really intrigues me as I am an ASPIRING FILMMAKER.

There is your monthly STATE OF THE WEBSITE.

Get out there. Do your part. Bring more Readers, as the content hungers for more.

That is all.